John Hain
How do you create a connection with your audience? To connect means to be real, to be authentic. The audience wants to know who you are as a person, not just as a presenter. They want to know your challenges and your triumphs. But what is the line between authenticity and wearing your heart on your sleeve? When should you show vulnerability and why?
Traditionally, you were expected to come to work and leave your emotions at home. You didn’t mix business with personal issues. Today, in a more enlightened society, we realize you can’t separate your emotions from your persona. The mind and body are connected. And in an era where people crave connection, they want to know you as a real person. Sometimes that requires vulnerability to create trust. When you’re vulnerable, you model your humanity. People learn it’s okay not to be perfect. It creates empathy and gives them permission to be genuine. Showing vulnerability can build trust when done in the right way.
But how do you share your vulnerability without making people uncomfortable?
Assess the environment
The first consideration is to create a safe space. When you know the audience you can be more forthcoming. It’s riskier to be vulnerable with strangers.
Recently, I attended a professional workshop. The CEO of the company kicked off the meeting as was always the case and participated in the two day curriculum along with other presenters. Everyone in the room knew who she was, some more than others. This was not a first encounter.
Set the stage
She began by saying she had an announcement that she was dreading but had decided to tell us anyway. She built up to the message instead of blurting it out. She talked about her feelings and that her news was difficult to share. In other words she primed us for what was to come.
Deliver the message clearly and directly
Then she opened up and told us she had been diagnosed with a chronic disease. We listened to her story of the first symptoms and the subsequent diagnosis. She created a picture with her story and told us that this disease runs in her family. And even knowing it was genetic she hadn’t anticipated this situation to be part of her future. She explained she would sit during the lecture to preserve her energy.
Make a request
The next step was to make a definitive request. She explained that well-intentioned friends and family were giving her advice, referrals, and remedies. It was overwhelming and not helpful. She asked that nobody approach her with advice or even share their own past experience. She reiterated her request three different times and stated it with conviction. It was clear that there would be no exceptions. To my knowledge everyone honored her wishes.
Recap and thank you. End on a positive note.
She let people know she felt hopeful and positive. She mentioned that she was looking forward to the workshop and then kicked off the program with enthusiasm. It’s important to not be a Debbie Downer. Being vulnerable does not make you a victim. End on a positive note.
When done right, vulnerability can be transformative through:
Deeper connections: Audiences relate to your humanity
Increased trust: Openness fosters a sense of honesty
Memorable impact: Personal stories often resonate more than facts and figures
Be vulnerable, be authentic, be you.
Do you remember a time when a leader was vulnerable? What was the impact it had on you?
To learn how to Speak Confidently and Effectively check out my LinkedIn learning course. It ranked in the Top 20 Most Popular courses for 2 years.
To learn techniques to overcome fear of speaking, read Chapter 3 of Knockout Presentations.
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