Tell Your Own Stories Not Someone Else's

I'm honored to have Jeffrey Hayzlett as a guest blogger. Whether in life, or in business, there’s no cookie-cutter, surefire way to achieve success, no one plan you have to follow. We all carve our own niche, create our own success, but there are some things all successful entrepreneurs have in common: they Think Big and Act Bigger. Meaning, they tie visions to actions—go beyond the stories and excuses, the self—imposed limitations, preconceived notions and constraining structures to become the biggest, baddest, best versions of themselves.

Here are five principles that have helped me stay on track throughout my career:

Be Authentic   I consider myself a successful businessman, but that success doesn’t come from trophies or accolades. It comes from being me all the time. It’s OK if you’re not everyone’s cup of tea; it’s going to happen. Some of the best people I’ve met act the same way in public (or in a business setting) and at home. That authenticity comes through in every setting – during a meeting or at a keynote. There’s no need to second-guess their motives and they exude trust.

If you’ve been conditioned to think that being yourself is risky, ask yourself why? To me, that sounds exhausting. Having to pretend to be someone else is no way to live. How can your business stand for something when you can’t even stand up for yourself? Being anything less than yourself could have serious repercussions for your business. It can kill morale, productivity, loyalty, vision and eventually, your bottom line.

Adapt, Change or Die Your story will need to revolve over time. That’s a given! However, many people are afraid of changes, thinking that it will change the core of who they are. That couldn’t be further from the truth. It’s OK to evolve, and to even change your mind about things. That doesn’t change your core. If you refuse to evolve and change with the times, you run the risk of being the dinosaur in the room, and we all know what happened to them. Extinction shouldn’t be part of your plan. Ever!

What’s Your Story? That’s one question I ask everyone I meet. I ask, not only because I am interested, but because I’m curious to see how original their story is. I want to see if they stand up for something or if they’ve crafted their story out of someone else’s experience. For example, I am firmly against TED Talks, not because they’re useless, but because I think they cultivate a false sense of idolatry. There are some great people that speak at TED Talk with great, useful advice. But that’s their story; it will never be YOUR story. There’s no single solution to any problem, so while the TED Talks may inspire many, it can create a sheep mentality and not encourage the individuality I look for in people and entrepreneurs.

What Are Your Conditions of Satisfaction? In business, I always adhere to the following criteria: is it going to make me money, will I grow professionally and am I going to have fun doing it? Those are my conditions of satisfaction. I might consider a business opportunity that satisfies two of the three under the right circumstances, but never just one – no matter how good the money is.

Find out what makes you happy and meet your own conditions of satisfaction. Throughout my career, I have learned that violating those conditions, it never ends up well and it usually ends up costing me some money. So unless your last name’s Rockefeller, I wouldn’t recommend losing money on something that doesn’t interest you.

When in doubt, ask yourself the following questions: 1) Who are you? 2) What do you want to do? 3) Where do you want to go? 4) What is your end game? 5) How does it all connect to the story that sells you?

I’ll leave you with the following: the only thing that ever limited me were the voices in my head telling me I couldn’t do something or needed to do it differently. Basically, get out of your own way, ignore the naysayers and forge ahead. Find your own success.

Jeffrey Hayzlett Primetime TV & Radio Host, Keynote Speaker, Best-Selling Author and Global Business Celebrity Jeffrey Hayzlett is a primetime television host of C-Suite with Jeffrey Hayzlett and Executive Perspectives on C-Suite TV, and business radio host of All Business with Jeffrey Hayzlett on CBS on-demand radio network Play.It. He is a global business celebrity, speaker, best-selling author, and Chairman of C-Suite Network, home of the world’s most powerful network of C-Suite leaders. Hayzlett is a well-traveled public speaker, the author of two bestselling business books, The Mirror Test and Running the Gauntlet. His third book, Think Big, Act Bigger, releases September 2015. Hayzlett is one of the most compelling figures in business today.

Jeffrey is a leading business expert, cited in Forbes, SUCCESS, Mashable, Marketing Week and Chief Executive, among many others. He shares his executive insight and commentary on television networks like Bloomberg, MSNBC, Fox Business, and C-Suite TV. Hayzlett is a former Bloomberg contributing editor and primetime host, and has appeared as a guest celebrity judge on NBC’s Celebrity Apprentice with Donald Trump for three seasons. He is a turnaround architect of the highest order, a maverick marketer and C-Suite executive who delivers scalable campaigns, embraces traditional modes of customer engagement, and possesses a remarkable cachet of mentorship, corporate governance, and brand building.

3 Magic Words that Kill Public Speaking Fear

Did you ever wonder if there was an Aladdin's Lamp for public speaking? All you would need to do is ask the Genie for the magic words to eliminate fear of public speaking or performance anxiety. Just like the eternal search for the fountain of youth, people still yearn for that elixir, potion, or formula that will make their nervousness vanish. What I've discovered is that the words you speak have the power to transform how you think. It's not what you say but how you think about your fear. A number of years ago I spoke to a group of company leaders. They, like everyone else, were nervous about public speaking. At one point I looked them straight in the eye and made a statement. After the training seminar, people told me that those words were very powerful and changed how they thought about public speaking.

Fast forward to a coaching client who was afraid to speak up in her class. She even thought about dropping out of law school because she was so nervous about public speaking. I told her the same thing I told every public speaker. And then it happened. She started to think differently after I shared those famous words with her. She graduated from law school and went on to give presentations without fear.

Most recently, a former client called me for a refresher. She told me her manager noticed a big improvement in her presentation and the way she interacted with clients. He offered her the refresher coaching session to prepare for their upcoming high stakes presentation. During the meeting, my client shared with me that the words I said to her truly changed how she thought about presentations and public speaking. Are the words really magical? No! The words themselves contain nothing magical. What the words did was reframe the way people were thinking about their fear. They were viewing public speaking through a negative frame and that triggered anxiety.

Even though I'm a seasoned professional speaker, I found myself getting nervous the day before a presentation. It was a 10 minute spotlight for the National Speakers Association. I confided to my friend that I was a nervous wreck. I couldn't wait for it to be over. My friend grabbed me by the shoulders and said, "Diane, don't do that to yourself. You're not nervous. You're energized." So I went home and recited my new mantra: "I'm energized. I'm energized." The next morning I gave my speech and it was a success. Words do make a difference.

The 3 magic words have made an impact on so many people. I think it is time I share them with you. So what are the 3 Magic Words that help people face their fear?

"It's About Them."

When I speak to audiences of nervous presenters, I tell them, "Get over yourself. It's not about you. It's about them." What they've come to realize is that at the very core of public speaking nervousness is a feeling of being self-centered. That's right. If you focus on the fear, you're thinking about yourself. If you think about what the audience wants and needs, you're coming from a place of service.

Language reflects thought. Change your language and you'll change your thinking. The next time anxiety occupies your mind, change your focus. Tell yourself, "It's about them."

What have you said to yourself to change your thinking?

How to Influence an Audience without Saying a Word

Have you ever made an impact without saying a word? I remember how my father could stop me dead in my tracks with one look. You may have experienced "that look." It meant "Don't even try it. I mean business." But how do you do that when speaking in public?

How does a public speaker make that kind of impact and influence? Most presenters try to make impact by telling stories. Some use humor while other public speakers use vocal variety to influence. Using their voices like fine-tuned instruments, these presenters get louder to excite you and speak softly to draw you in. While these are all good techniques to communicate with an audience, there was one speaker recently, who transcended words to send a message.

I was watching the UN speeches at the General Assembly. Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu was at the podium. At one point I was simultaneously listening and checking my email messages when all of sudden the sound stopped. Ten-Fifteen-Twenty-Thirty seconds and still no sound. I looked up thinking I lost the cable connection. Thirty-five, Forty, Forty-five seconds passed and then Netanyahu resumed speaking. A 45 second pause! It was the longest pause I ever heard from a speaker. Combined with his glaring eye contact, his long silence signaled the audience that he meant business. His was a serious message.

How often do leaders and entrepreneurs rush through their message only to create a Doppler effect of words? The audience hears the sounds but the message fades just like a distant siren. Too many public speakers speak in run-on sentences or too fast leaving no room to pause. As an artist knows, it's the white space between the lines; it's the silence between the notes that makes the difference.

It takes confidence and a comfort in one's own skin to be able to pause. And few do it well. People are so afraid of silence. I coach clients to hold the energy of the audience and to embrace the sounds of silence. But it's easier said than done.

So start with this  simple exercise. Introduce yourself in one sentence. Most presenters say "Goodmorning,mynameis..." in one breath. Say it again with a pause.

"Good morning. (PAUSE). My name is..." Now do it again.

"Good morning. (LONGER PAUSE). My name is..." At the very least, give the audience time to respond.

"We don't have to hold the silence for 45 seconds like the Prime Minister, but if we don't master the pause, we'll become talking heads speaking in a vacuum. The only ones we'll influence will be  ourselves.

As Sri Sri Ravi Shakar said, "Real communication is beyond words. If you are firmly established in the zone of silence, if your mind is calm, you will find yourself suddenly being able to influence individuals, groups, and masses."

6 Periscope Presentation Tips

Have you done your first Periscope Presentation? It's a free live stream service you can access on your smart phone or tablet.

If you've ever given a live stream presentation, you know that it takes a lot of work. You first go into a studio. You're dependent on the technology crew. You need to stand in the right spot. And it's expensive.

Periscope is a great tool for anyone who wants to share their presentations and live experiences. Think twitter on video steroids. Public speaking is now accessible 24/7 in real time.

Why give presentations on Periscope? It's a powerful marketing tool. Giving valuable content in real time, a public speaker can build their brand, access greater reach, engage with their audience, and speak to people from anywhere in the world-even when you're on vacation. On a personal note, imagine sharing weddings and family events with relatives who cannot attend in person. It creates a bonded community.

But as with all public speaking, you'll want to present yourself in the best light. Here are some tips for maximizing the effectiveness of Periscope or live stream presentations.

1. Announce your presentation in advance. Don't think that people are going to tune in just because you popped up on their screen.Let your audience know that you'll be speaking live at a certain time and date. Send another reminder a few minutes before your broadcast.
2. Prepare your opening shot. Periscope will default to the first thing the camera sees. So, point your camera to the photo or scene you want to end the broadcast. Then tap the camera to point at you if you are the public speaker.
3. Engage. Start by welcoming and acknowledging the people who are watching. If you don't see any people icons, keep talking anyway. People will watch the replay. After the welcome, tell them a bit about yourself and then ask a question. Some presenters like to show the audience their venue or introduce them to their pets. People will respond in the chat box. The best presentations are dialogues.
4. Provide value. Do NOT make this a sales pitch. People will not return. Give the audience some tips or discuss an issue or industry trend. Ask for their input.
5. Be brief. It's better to do more frequent,, short presentations than a long session. They will get to know you over time and will look forward to your message.
6. Seize the moment. If you know something is going to happen, live stream it. When I had to leave the National Speakers Association convention early, my friend live streamed the keynotes. I was so grateful. If you're going to speak, ask a friend to film you on Periscope using your phone.

For years I've been saying that future public speakers would need broadcasting skills. That time is already here. Periscope is a great presentation tool that anybody can use. The possibilities are endless.

Three Presentations Entrepreneurs Must Master

Whether you’re a solopreneur or an INC 5000 CEO on the fast track, your ability to present yourself, your company, and your value, will determine the trajectory of your business Here are three presentations every entrepreneur must master:

The Positioning Statement. At the simplest level, the positioning statement is your company’s brand message. What do you do, whom do you serve, and how does the customer benefit?   It must be clear, concise, compelling and convincing. Aim for 15 seconds or less. To be concise, write your positioning statement as a tweet. In order to be compelling and convincing you’ll need to talk outcomes, not features.  It should prompt the listener to say, “How do you do this?”

Here are some examples:

A sales trainer: “I work with sales companies who want to sell more in less time.”

An actress: “I work with savvy professionals to speak with the poise, passion and persuasive power of a Broadway actor."

A divorce mediator: “I help you get your life back.”

Use sensory language and evocative metaphors to create emotion. The brain ignores overused expressions as simply words. Brain scans, however, reveal that sensory metaphors like ‘silky voice' actually trigger the sensory cortex.  Hollywood producer, Peter Guber said that he lost a log of big deals in the beginning of his career because he gave investors “a lot of data but didn’t engage them emotionally”. So be expressive - descriptive - and tap into the listeners’ emotions.

Marketing with a Speech. If you’re not speaking to promote your business, you’re leaving money on the table. Public speaking is the most cost effective and yet underutilized form of marketing. Offering seminars and presentations to your target audience, allows you to show them how you can solve their problems and serve their needs. This is much less time consuming than scheduling one-on-one meetings. When the audience sees you in action, it’s like test driving a car. You build trust through your message and live performance.

To succeed with speak marketing, you’ll need to bone up on your platform skills. Poor presentation skills will foster a lack of trust. And don’t make it a sales pitch. The key to success is to engage the audience by giving them an experience. One sales manager taped a dollar bill under each chair. During his pitch to convince the sales team to sell more, he told them to reach under their seats. When they had the dollar bill in their hands he bellowed, “It just goes to show you there’s money to be made when you get off your butt.”

Provide value, offer a few tips, and challenge their thinking. Be sure to have a low entry call to action such as a free strategy session or a discounted product. The goal is to gather sales leads. The easiest way to capture business cards is to raffle off a prize.

Pitching for Dollars. At some point, a company will need funding in order to grow. To get investors to part with their money requires a compelling story. Facts tell, but stories sell. In telling the business story, the entrepreneur must convey passion and confidence. The presentation deck won’t sell itself. I once asked an investor how much weight he gave the presentation. He told me that a strong management team was most important but decided against funding one company because the CEO was a weak presenter. This made the investors lose confidence in the company. Make strong eye contact, eliminate /ums/, and speak with conviction.

The power of passion cannot be underplayed. Research shows a direct correlation between “perceived passion” and the likelihood of receiving funding from investors. A study by Chapman University published an experiment in the Journal of Business Venturing. Researchers asked angel investors to rate the passion and enthusiasm of the presenters while controlling for risk, revenue potential and market opportunity. Perceived passion came in third, outranking education, age, style, or start-up experience.

Another mistake is not knowing the audience. Angel investors are different from VCs. Understand their goals and do research to determine if they understand your industry. Remember to think from their point of view. Investors don’t care about your product. Tell them how they’ll make money. And be sure to get to the point. Investors have short attention spans. “They decide in 90 seconds if they are going to listen and decide in the first five minutes if it’s a NO”, according to Karen Rands, Founder of LAUNCH.fn. The ideal timing for a business pitch is 15-20 minutes.

By mastering these three entrepreneurial presentations, business owners will be able to take their companies to the next level and soar.

What Carly Fiorina Knows About Public Speaking Gravitas

Is public speaking the key to winning an election?   At the beginning of the debate 40% of the people didn't know Carly Fiorina. According to the google heat map, 82% googled her after her public speaking success. Whether you like her or not, clearly, she gave a stellar performance. She was a stand out among her peers, exuding executive presence and gravitas. What does that mean? If you define gravitas as decisiveness, poise under pressure, assertiveness, and confidence, Carly had it in spades.

Her presentation was clear, focused, and direct. Her tone was confident and not overly emotional. When questioned, she didn't miss a beat. Carly's speech was devoid of hesitations and fillers yet she did not sound canned. Her responses were well thought out and when pressed, she responded with explanations, not defensiveness. Contrasted to Donald Trump, who responded with anger, Carly appeared in control and presidential. Granted, she was not questioned by Megyn Kelly. But the mark of a true leader is to deflect hostile questions and bridge to the message points. Based on her performance in the first debate, there's a good chance she'd be able to handle tougher questioning. As a result of her presentation, she increased her name recognition.

Public speaking is the new competitive advantage. What sets you apart from the competition is your presentation. This was evident when watching some of the other candidates. Although they may have had greater name recognition and a resume of accomplishments, a few candidates came across as flat or nervous. Others were confrontational. Can public speaking be the key to winning an election? Probably not when politics are at play. But the best leaders are great communicators. In politics and in business, excellent presentation skills will make you memorable, extend your brand, and build confidence in your leadership.

3 Presentation Screw-Ups By the GOP Debate Moderators

After watching the first GOP Debate on TV, I was struck at the lack of skill of some the moderators. These are professional broadcast journalists and you would think their public speaking training in front of the camera would be evident.

Here are three mistakes a professional moderator should avoid:

1. Grammatical Errors. One of the male moderators actually said, "Was wrote" instead of "Was written." Don't they teach grammar in school anymore? It made him sound uneducated and I wondered how he was selected for this position. It takes more than good looks to moderate a television debate. He lost credibility.

2. Citing an Opinion or Irrelevant Remarks. A professional moderator asks provocative questions but doesn't make remarks like one of the moderators did tonight. Governor Perry said that in his first day in office he'd need a bottle of white out to erase all the executive orders of the previous administration and it would be a long day. The moderator quipped, "Yes, that would be a long day". There was no reason to comment. This is not a one-on-one discussion. The moderator is not there to validate the candidate. The goal is to stay neutral.

3. Not Getting to the Point. A female moderator didn't seem to understand the difference between asking a question and giving a speech. She delivered a lead in of about three sentences before she posed the actual question. We don't need background information. Just ask the question!  Not only is this frustrating to the audience, but it signals that the moderator is not a clear thinker or communicator. It's a communication style of a novice.

The good news is you don't have to fear public speaking. If professional broadcasters are making these mistakes you don't have to worry that you'll derail on the platform. Learn from their mistakes and keep these points in mind whenever you're the moderator or a public speaker.

The GPS Girl's Top 10 Directions for Vocal Health for Public Speakers

I'm honored to have  Karen Jacobsen – The GPS Girl® – as my guest blogger. Read her top 10 tips for having a healthy voice. Whether you are a professional speaker or a business professional your voice is a key asset.  It’s the core of our ability to communicate, to get our ideas across and to be heard.  As a professional speaker and singer my voice is essential to my profession.  What I have discovered is that excellent vocal health happens to also result in excellent overall health.

Here are some of the ways I protect my voice on a daily basis:

1. Be Rested

To maintain a healthy voice one of the basics is getting enough rest.  I have to make sure I am on top of getting a good 8 hours of sleep per night consistently to keep my voice in great shape.  Put sleep in your calendar like an important appointment (because it is) and prevent being run down.

2. Drink a Crazy Amount of Water

This is an absolute essential.  I drink 6 - 10 glasses of water throughout the day (did you know that 80% of Americans are dehydrated?) and I also drink tea.  I prefer almost tannin-free tea and make sure I am drinking water and tea all day long.  If you need to, set an alarm several times a day as a reminder.

3. Honey is My Secret Weapon

Honey has amazing healing properties, pleasant to taste and is very soothing.  If I am feeling a little tickle in my throat or I am vocally tired, I will have a spoonful of honey.  It's one of the ways I will fight off something, by having a teaspoon of honey every hour or half hour, especially before bed.

4. Carry a Scarf

I carry a scarf with me 12 months of the year as I am often in some kind of artificially heated or cooled environment.  Even in the height of summer when walking into a restaurant or a convention room it is icy.  Being able to protect my throat with a scarf helps my body temperature and specifically my throat.  If I find my throat or neck is exposed and it is unusually cool I can catch a chill and it can be downhill from there, potentially leading to a vocal problem.

5. Oil Pulling

We already know about keeping hydrated and I recently learned about an ancient Ayurveda treatment called Oil Pulling.  This is amazing for overall health, and involves swishing cold-pressed organic sesame oil in the mouth for between 7 and 20 minutes first thing each morning.  I learned this from a top New York vocal coach, Joan Baker, and a great side effect is a vast improvement in dental health.  There is a lot of excellent information online about oil pulling.

6. Yelling is Telling

If you are in a loud environment and straining to be heard over music or talking, or at a sporting event, do not yell.  Do not scream.  Do not cheer super loudly.  It's something to be extremely conscious of to protect your voice.

7. If it Hurts, Don't Do It

This may sound pretty obvious, but we've all been in a situation where we are a little too exuberant with our voice and it starts to hurt.  You may be giving a presentation and the microphone isn't working properly, or you are trying to be heard over loud music or conversation.  If it hurts in any way, it is hurting your vocal cords and could lead to major problems.

8. Beware of Dairy

If you have to use your voice more than usual and know you will have to talk with people all day long at a conference or trade show, or with back to back business meetings when you are usually have a quieter workday in the office, watch how much dairy is in your diet.  It can create more mucus and the vocal passages are not as clear.

9. Skip the Ice

In the U.S. ice is routinely served in cold drinks and this can lead to big vocal problems.  It can tighten or numb your vocal cords, and for me it just irritates my throat and leaves me more susceptible to a sore throat.  Always ask for water with no ice and wean yourself off ice in all beverages.  This can have an amazing impact on your vocal comfort.

10. Clearing your Throat can Cause Injury

Do not under any circumstances 'clear your throat.'  This can actually injure your vocal cords.  Instead, take a sip of water, cough gently or swallow to clear the throat

Building the strength of your voice and preventing vocal problems is a lot more enjoyable than having them show up.  Rest, hydrate and pay attention to the way you are using your voice on a daily basis and enjoy excellent vocal health.  You might just feel so much better in the process.

Karen Jacobsen is The GPS Girl®, an entertainer who moved in 2000 from Australia to New York with a suitcase and a dream. Karen gives directions as the speaking voice of  “Australian Karen” in over 400 million GPS and smartphone devices around the world. A professional speaker, singer and voice-over artist, Karen travels the world speaking and performing concert-style keynotes to groups who want to be able to “recalculate” and give their best in business and life. Karen has appeared on ABC World News Tonight, NBC Today Show, CBS Early Show, Inside Edition, NPR, The New York Times, NY Daily News, Glamour Magazine, and was named one of People Magazine’s Most Intriguing People. Sharing the bill with Norah Jones, Neil Sedaka and Christopher Cross, she has performed The Star Spangled Banner at many major sporting events including the New York Jets game at Giants Stadium. Karen Jacobsen currently serves as President of the National Speakers Association-New York City.

For more information visit thegpsgirl.com. Connect with her @thegpsgirl on Twitter and Facebook.com/thegpsgirl 

Public Speaking Challenge: Can You Give A Speech In 6 Seconds?

What if this happened to you? You prepare a presentation, and then the public speaker before you uses up all the time. What if you only had 6 seconds? Would you give a presentation or would you pick up your marbles and go home? The public speaking game has changed.The digital age requires speed, brevity, and clarity. Public speakers are competing with technology. Your presentation has to be more compelling than their texts. Audience attention spans are shrinking. They're expecting 18 minute TED talks. Presentations are getting shorter and shorter, especially video presentations.

So as a public speaker, how do you present value in less time?

It's important to get to the point quickly. It's harder to give a speech in 10 minutes than in one hour. Less time requires more focus.

This month, the National Speaker's Association has their annual convention. The theme is Influence 2015. All professional speakers were challenged to submit a 6 second presentation. As a seasoned public speaker, the shortest video presentation I've given is 1 minute. So I decided to take the public speaking challenge!

Here is my 6 second presentation:

So now I'm challenging you to send me a video of your 6 second presentation. Submit the link to your video in the comments below. I'll be timing you!

Public Speaking Bloopers

Are you a perfectionist? Get over it. It's killing your presentation. In every speech and presentation class, I tell the audience that I don't allow perfection - for two reasons:

1. You can't achieve perfection on earth so why frustrate yourself?
2. Even if you could achieve it, people will resent you. Nobody likes a perfect person.

And the same is true for public speakers. Nobody can relate to a perfectly polished presenter. In fact, a public speaker who is too polished can be perceived as slick. The goal is to be human. The audience relates to your humanity, not your perfection. Yes, your presentation needs to be professional and confident. But that doesn't mean you don't trip over a word, occasionally blank out or get loud feedback noise from the microphone. It's not about a perfect presentation. It's about a confident recovery.

People who hear me speak often say, "Diane embodies her message. I learned as much by watching her on stage as I did from her content." Let me assure you that there are times when I screw up. But I make sure I recover with grace. So I'm sharing some recent bloopers as I was preparing new youtube videos. As you can see, effective public speaking and video presentations take a lot of practice. A professional video presentation requires many takes. While the finished video presentation may appear seamless, this peek behind the camera demonstrates that the process takes a lot of practice.

Now that you can see I'm not a perfect public speaker, maybe you'll stop trying to be perfect and get real!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_qHuZfUOujc

Public Speaking is Being Infected by a Vocal Virus

Anthrax isn't the only bacteria we need to worry about. There's a vocal virus that is sweeping the nation. In the last few days, I've been getting more responses to a video on my youtube channel about Uptalk. It seems to be hitting a nerve. Watch here, then keep reading below:

https://youtu.be/LdhJxAmUu3Y

To many listeners, Uptalk sounds like nails on a chalkboard. I've had employers contact me to work with young women who have this speech pattern. Uptalk does not serve anyone in the workplace. It kills your credibility, destroys your presentations, makes you sound younger and less confident, and can prevent you from being promoted or working on high profile projects.

Here are a couple of recent comments on youtube:

This video should be shown once a week in schools here in the U.S. Males do this too now as well. It is terrible, and makes males look/appear incredibly effeminate.  You are doing God's work, Diane."

Scarey - Every woman in my office under the age of 40 uptalks, more than men but men are doing it as well.  One person literally uptalks on every sentence.  I even now hear older people starting to do this.  It is taking over.

Do you think it's too late? Is Uptalk already embedded in the culture? Should the schools and workplace intervene or should we let Uptalk continue to evolve? Your thoughts?

https://youtu.be/OFJv3KcukmA

Public Speaking: Who Did It Better: Michelle or Denzel?

What would you say if you were asked to give a commencement address? You don't have to be famous to give a speech to graduating seniors. Last month, my sister, a retired Air Force officer, was asked to give a commencement speech to military nurses. This week I coached a Senior Vice-President on her speech to her alma mater. And now, Michelle Obama and Denzel Washington, no strangers to public speaking, delivered commencement speeches. Michelle spoke to Spelman College. Denzel addressed the students of  Dillard University. They took very different approaches. Michelle, a polished public speaker, focused on the problem. She warned students of the prejudice and obstacles they would encounter and talked about her struggles.

Denzel's focus was more aspirational. He talked about his journey from obscurity to fame reminding students of the ultimate source of their power.

Public speaking is a leadership skill. As a leader, which approach would you take to motivate, inspire, and influence? A commencement speech is delivered to future leaders to share lessons learned and a path toward success.

Who did it better? Michelle or Denzel?

https://youtu.be/HVCt2CCeNO0?t=3m6s

https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=21&v=_WG3nDda6D8

What's Triggering Your Public Speaking Fear?

We've all been there - the racing heart, the sweating palms, the cotton mouth. Many clients call me because they're nervous or experiencing public speaking panic. The mere thought of public speaking can trigger anxiety in some presenters. May is Better Speech and Hearing Month and it's a good time to assess the state of your speaking skills.

Ask yourself these questions:

• What do I see when I think of myself speaking?
• What do I say to myself?
• How do I think I'll feel when I finish my speech?

I would bet a lot of money that the answers to those questions are negative. The act of public speaking is neutral. We charge it with anxious energy by the way we think. Successful speakers know that confidence begins in the mind.

So in honor of Better Speech and Hearing Month, resolve to watch this public speaking affirmations video everyday. The only thing that's triggering your public speaking fear is you.

May Is Better Speech and Hearing Month

These better speech tips will have you communicating with confidence!

May is Better Speech and Hearing Month - Public Speaking Tip 1

Do you need a check-up from the neck up? May is Better Speech and Hearing Month and all month I'll be sending you tips on caring for your voice and articulators.

Just like working out at a gym, your facial and oral muscles need to be exercised to function well. Singers and performers warm up by singing scales. Public speakers need to do the same for their articulation.

Here is today's tip:

Warm up before your public speaking engagement with these vocal exercises for the lips, tongue, and jaw.

Lip trills: Say brrrrr. with your lips. It's the sound you make when you're cold. If you do it correctly, your lips will vibrate.

Lip and tongue coordination. Say puh tuh kuh, puh tuh kuh, puh tuh kuh in rapid fire succession.

Lip coordination: Place a pencil between your teeth and say this tongue twister-"Rubber Baby Buggy Bumpers". It causes you to over articulate which will improve your clarity.

Jaw: Place the top of your hand under your chin. Drop your jaw as low as it can go. With your hand in place, say Yaw, Yaw, Yaw.

Do this daily or at least right before your next presentation. You'll feel more relaxed and you'll articulate more clearly and fluently.

They're Just Not That Into You

Get your audience to like you!

It's World Voice Day - Do You Have a Voice?

Do you have a voice? Voice matters. Everyone has a right to express their voice. But you can't do that if you've lost your voice.  It's World Voice Day, a day dedicated to the care of the voice. You use your voice everyday and vocal misuse and abuse are not uncommon. Follow these tips for  a healthy voice.

Vocal Hygiene Tips

• Don't struggle to speak above loud noises.
• Avoid dairy products 24 hours before a long speech.
• Use abdominal breathing.
• Read more vocal hygiene tips here.

Avoid Vocal Fry

Vocal fry is a phenomenon that is taking off around the nation. Watch my interview with Nancy Redd on HuffPost Live to hear what it sounds like:

Even NPR broadcasters have fallen victim to vocal fry. Recently, they reported that they have received a fair amount of hate mail about the young women on their staff using vocal fry. Ira Glass investigates: If You Don't Have Anything Nice to Say, SAY IT IN ALL CAPS

Don't Use Uptalk

Uptalk is another vocal phenomenon that robs the speaker of his power. What is uptalk? It's when the speaker uses a rising inflection at the end of their sentence so it sounds like a question. Watch my video to hear it and to learn why it's spreading.

Women Need To Speak Up

World Voice Day is a perfect time to revisit the importance of women speaking up so they are heard. Some women speak in a breathy voice, and are too soft spoken. Uptalk and vocal fry get in the way of effective self expression.

Are you guilty of hindering your own communication? Ask a buddy to listen to you speak. Are you using uptalk, vocal fry, or a breathy, soft voice? Have your friend tell you when you do it so you can learn to stop it. Just make sure it's someone who will be honest with you!