What do you do when you encounter a poor loser? If you're giving a keynote speech to a large audience this won't be an issue. But if you facilitate groups, or give seminars you will be interacting with the audience. Although a poor loser may rarely surface, he or she can disrupt the group if you don't know how to handle this difficult audience personality. Watch this brief video to lean how to handle difficult audience members.
Difficult Audiences: The Complainer
One of the most annoying difficult audience members is the complainer, a.k.a., the whiner. Nothing you do pleases them. They complain about everything. Yet, many public speakers make this one mistake when trying to deal with them. Find out what it is by watching the brief video on handling difficult audiences.
Difficult Audiences: The Sidetalker
Public speakers, facilitators, and trainers are often challenged by disruptive audience members. One of the most irritating disruptions is side-talking.
You have an important message you prepared and while you're delivering your presentation, you're competing with the chattering in the room. It may be a couple of people having a side conversation or there may be a buzz in the audience because the group discussion went off track. What do you do? How do you handle a difficult audience when the issue is side-talking? When should you ignore it and how should you intervene? Watch this brief video to find out.
Difficult Audiences: The Expert
What do you do when you encounter an expert or know-it-all in your seminar? Public speakers must be able to handle difficult audiences, yet each personality is different. It's important to know what is driving the disruptive behavior in order to keep control of the audience. In this brief video you'll learn how to manage the expert.
Difficult Audiences: The Dominator
Public speakers, facilitators, and trainers must be able to manage difficult audience behavior. One of the more challenging personalities is the dominator. This person can be disruptive because of a need to control. The risk is that the speaker or facilitator may get into a power struggle. And this is a losing strategy. Watch this brief video to learn how to handle the dominator.
Difficult Audiences: The Rambler
Public speakers and trainers need to be able to manage difficult audiences. One difficult audience member is the rambler or storyteller. You'll recognize this personality because they love to talk. During the question and answer period this is the person who can't get to the point. During a discussion they have trouble staying on message and while they may be entertaining, they can dominate a conversation. This can cause the presentation to go off track and for the speaker to lose control. Watch this brief video to learn how to handle the rambler.
What Christina Aguilera's Flub Can Teach Us About Public Speaking
During the Superbowl Christina Aguilera sang the National Anthem. She started strong with her powerful voice and her signature vibrato vocalizations and eleven second notes. As she continued singing she substituted the wrong words for a line of the lyrics. Instead of reciting "O'er the ramparts we watched, were so gallantly streaming" she substituted "What so proudly we watched at the twilight's last reaming." While anyone can make a mistake, an audience expects a professional performer to know the words. It's also significant because this is a national song that we hear at every game and civic event. Yes, a professional singer and speaker should be prepared. But that's not the main lesson. The question is, why didn't we catch the mistake? This is a performer with a booming, powerful voice. I certainly wasn't aware of it until the media pointed it out. My husband didn't catch the mistake, either.
I believe the reason we missed it was because we were distracted. I commented during the performance on how her vocal gymnastics were overkill. Her focus was on her melodic variations and range. The song became about the mechanics and not the feeling. My attention followed the seesaw of her tones rather than on the well written words. The song seemed to be a showcase of her versatility rather than a connection with the audience. Advertisers vie for the coveted Superbowl commercial spots. Christina had a national spotlight and she blew it.
Public speakers can learn a lesson from Christina's performance. Authenticity trumps technique and connection is more important than content. When speakers come from ego, they sacrifice the relationship with the audience. Showing off one's platform skills, instead of connecting with the audience, can expose the speaker to all kinds of risk.
One professional speaker had an opportunity to present at a convention. She was generally confident and knew she could WOW them on stage. And that became her focal point. She walked on stage as if she owned it. She confidently belted out her first story as she had done many times. And then she went blank. Totally blank. The audience tried to encourage her with applause. It was painful to watch because she was a pro. She finally regained her composure but the speech was not a success. Later, she explained that she had tried to impress the audience with her smooth performance skills. She recognized once she was back "inside her body" that she had learned an important lesson.
You're never too skilled to practice. And it's not about you. It's about them-the AUDIENCE.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zzlqbVNTWNQ
Words Have Power
Monday, January 24th was National Compliment Day. I had to travel two hours to coach a CEO who was out- of - state and I didn't have much computer time. So before I left, I sent a tweet telling my followers to compliment five people. I was surprised when one person immediately sent me a compliment. It made me feel good. I emailed a few people my compliments and took off for my trip. I was not prepared for what was about to happen next. People started responding to my words.
One friend wrote:
"YOU have no idea what a wonderful friend you are and always will be to me, or how much I needed this today. I had a horrible day at work and your compliment lifted my spirits to the sun and back. Thank you."
Another person wrote: "Thank you so much, Diane. You have no idea how much I needed that."
When I told my husband I sent him a compliment he started walking upstairs. I asked him where he was going. He said, "I'm going to the computer to read my compliment."
It truly hit home what power there is in words and how starved people are for a word of appreciation. They weren't sent a testimonial letter-just one simple compliment. Their reaction surprised me. It made me want to continue wrapping people in words of praise. Words not only have the power to change people's emotions and self-esteem, but they empower the speaker who uses them. Imagine how one sentence can change the way someone experiences their day.
Public speakers have an incredible power. It's the power of the spoken word. A public speaker has a platform and what a privilege it is! The right word, perfectly timed, and said in the right voice can LITERALLY lift people's spirits. Martin Luther King had this gift. Joel Osteen has this gift, too. But you don't have to be a gifted speaker to impact lives in a positive way. You don't even have to be in front of a group. All you have to do is speak your word. And then the magic happens.
When the Speaker Turns a Toast into a Roast
Sunday night we watched the Golden Globe awards spiral downward into a verbal slapfest. Ricky Gervais, the emcee for the evening, pushed the envelope and went beyond edgy to offensive. A comedian is supposed to be funny, witty, and a little risque. However, as a public speaker, Gervais seemed to be oblivious to the fact that he was speaking in public. Rather than being funny, his comments and barbs were insulting and at times downright mean. Although others may disagree, an awards ceremony should honor the winners while using wit and humor to poke fun at the recipients and film industry. Think Billy Crystal. What makes the commentary funny is that there is a kernel of truth in the joke which makes the audience laugh. When introducing actor Robert Downey Jr, Gervais said, "But many of you in this room probably know him best from such facilities as the Betty Ford Clinic and Los Angeles County Jail." Ouch. As a listener, it didn't feel good and it didn't make me laugh. It felt like an attack. The real humor was missing because the comments lacked a lightness.
Downey shot back, "Aside from the fact that it's been hugely mean-spirited with mildly sinister undertones, I'd say the vibe of the show has been pretty good so far, wouldn't you?" As a coach, I must say that this was a good comeback. It was quick, clever, and he acknowledged the elephant in the room. I've attended roasts at the Friar's Club in New York City and they can be brutal. But one thing is different. Most of the jokes are funny and there's a lot of laughter. When hosting an awards ceremony or even a roast, it's not about the emcee. It's about the honorees.
Gervais was not alone in his bad behavior. After accepting the Cecil B. DeMille award, Robert De Niro hurled a zinger at the foreign press. " I'm sorry more members of the Hollywood Foreign Press aren't with us tonight, but most of them got deported right before the show. Along with most of the waiters. And Javier Bardem." De Niro was not gracious. This kind of poor judgment is exactly the kind of communication that causes people to lose their jobs. As a public speaker, your presentation is your brand. And your words will live on long after you exit the stage.
Speaking Resolutions: Eleven for 2011
Make this your best year. Start by polishing your presentation and communication skills. Resolve to follow these eleven speaking principles to speak with greater impact.
- Make a promise to improve your communication skills.
A promise is stronger than a goal. When you promise, it's the strongest commitment you can make to yourself.
- Follow the 6-by-6 Rule when using PowerPoint.
Aim for reader-friendly slides: 6 words or less per line and 6 lines or less per slide.
- Give a speech without PowerPoint.
We are PowerPointed out! Don't use slides as a crutch. Try connecting with the audience. The key word in visual aid is AID. You are the message.
- Get comfortable with silence.
Most people fear silence and this causes them to speak too fast and to use lots of 'um's and 'ah's. Practice dramatic pauses.
- Listen to the audience listening. There's always a silent communication between the speaker and the audience. Tune in, feel, and hear what the audience is telling you.
- Speak from your head and your heart.
Speakers either give too much data and stay on the intellectual plane or they just tell entertaining stories without enough substance. Today's audiences want hard data in an entertaining style.
- Tell more stories. Stories create word pictures, which are memorable and touch the heart. Even a business presentation is more effective when using stories, analogies, and metaphors.
- Don't be afraid to be real. You don't have to be a perfect presenter. Most audiences don't relate to someone who's slick and overly polished. Don't imitate someone else. Be your authentic self - the audience can see through phoniness.
- Kick your energy up a notch. Enthusiasm sells and with bigger groups you need greater energy to make an impact. You need to push your energy past your comfort level, especially on video and television, which tend to reduce energy.
- Practice the Rule of Three. Most people think in threes. When crafting a presentation, aim for three agenda items, three main points, three benefits.
- Get over yourself - it's not about you, it's about the audience. Fear of public speaking is still at the top of our list of phobias. Take the focus off of YOU - when you're nervous, you're self-centered. Focus on the audience.
Good communicators are more successful in all areas of life: relationships, career, and well-being. And speaking is the new competitive weapon.
The King's Speech-If He Can Do It So Can You
I just saw the movie, The King's Speech starring Geoffrey Rush and Colin Firth. It's the story about King George and his struggle to overcome severe stuttering and the relationship between him and his speech coach. As a Speech Pathologist who worked with stutterers and as a speaking strategist who coaches executives, it was a powerful reminder to me of the gift of speech. King George was thrust into a leadership role he didn't want and had to inspire a nation during World War II. How do you do that without speaking? The answer is -you don't. Enter the speech coach. It was inspiring to watch King George overcome his struggles, resistance to coaching, and outright fear. He confronted his biggest fear and won!
While only 1% of the population stutters, most people fear public speaking. When first working with clients, I see the same fears, resistance, and avoidance that was portrayed in the movie. And yet, without the gift of speech, lives and careers are negatively impacted. Today more than ever you must be able to present yourself, your message, and your value.
Speaking is the new competitive weapon. In a competitive job market, candidates who have the best communication and speaking skills have the advantage. Leaders who have good presentation skills are better positioned for success. Sales people who are good public speakers can better influence. Industry experts with good public speaking skills get invited to convey their message at prestigious conferences, and authors who speak well get invited back for media interviews.
Your presentation is your brand. Your voicemail message and even your ring tone convey your brand. How you deliver your elevator speech determines whether people want to do business with you. How you speak and present yourself can be an indicator of education level and socioeconomic status. A study conducted in the 1970s demonstrated that sales reps in upscale department stores had better diction than those who worked in bargain stores.
Public speaking is a skill everyone must master in order to be successful. It's not going away. Avoidance by delegation is not a long time strategy. If you're the CEO, the shareholders want to hear from you. A CEO or CFO who rambles or sounds hesitant doesn't inspire confidence in the analysts. And this can affect a stock's rating. A manager will not motivate a team by giving a lackluster pep talk devoid of emotion. Entrepreneurs who can't communicate a clear business strategy and convey confidence will forfeit investor funding. Students who don't know how to present themselves during an interview, may not gain entry to the college of choice.
You don't have to speak the King's English to be successful but you do need to know how to speak and speak well. I believe gifted speakers are born but effective speakers are made. It doesn't take a major overhaul for most people to be effective. It's the little things that make the most impact. Everyone can be effective and speak with confidence. Public speaking is a skill. Skills + Practice=Confidence. Make this the year you learn to speak with confidence.
You Say Goodbye, I Say Hello: Non-Verbal Communication in India
Today public speaking is no longer restricted to your local community or company. It's a global world and that means sooner or later you'll speak internationally or your audience will comprise multinationals. It's imperative for speakers to be savvy about cross cultural communication. It's so easy to unknowingly insult the audience. All it takes is the wrong gesture. This video will expand your awareness and your presentation skills. Students created this simple and entertaining presentation to teach you how to communicate when speaking in India. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YEVP0gMvQIY&feature=player_embedded
What Preachers Can Teach Us About Public Speaking
A Canadian preacher told a story to his congregation during a television broadcast. He recalled two travelers talking to each other on a train platform. One traveler sees the train arrive with a sign to Ottawa. He turns to the stranger and says, "It looks like the train is going to Ottawa." The stranger agrees as they watch the train pull out of the station and head in the direction of Ottawa. Another train arrives some time later and both men acknowledge that this train, too, is going to Ottawa. The train leaves and neither man ever gets on the train. They both believed that the train was going to Ottawa but belief was not enough. Without the commitment to get on the train they might as well be going to Timbuktu. They would never arrive at their destination. The preacher then compared the action of the strangers watching the train go by to practicing one's faith. It's not enough to believe. One must make a commitment and take action to live one's faith
By using the train analogy the preacher created a memorable word picture that will stick in the minds of the listeners. When public speakers use word pictures in place of facts, the message has an emotional and lasting impact. The next time you have a speech or presentation look around for everyday events and like an artist, paint word pictures for your audience.
14 Ways to Present a Positive Image
It's the season for holiday parties and networking. Networking is a form of public speaking. Excellent presentation skills can draw people in and keep them interested.
Here are a few tips for making a good impression:
1. Own the room. Stand tall and walk in with confidence. 2. Smile. You'll appear more approachable and confident. 3. Be the first to reach out. Extend your hand and give a frim handshake. A weak handshake is an immediate turn off. 4. Look directly into someone's eyes. Don't scan the room while talking to one person. 5. Don't chew gum. 6. Speak clearly and pause. Sloppy or hurried speech is perceived as negative. Eliminate slang. 7. Be fully present. Focus on the person and listen non-verbally with body language and with words. 8. Ask questions about them instead of talking about yourself. 9. Find common ground quickly.This will build instant rapport. 10. Give compliments. 11. Paraphrase. It's a form of acknowledging people. This skill makes you very attractive. It communicates you're listening. 12. Have something interesting to say. Comment on the other person's interests. 13. Be a giver. Offer a tip or an introduction to others. Give without expecting anything in return. 14. Mirror the other person. Match their speaking rate, volume level, and words. If they speak fast, quicken your pace. If they are soft-spoken, lower your volume. People like people who are most like them.
Remember: It takes 7 seconds or less to make a good first impression.You're always on stage.
What Cory Booker Can Teach Us About Media Training
Cory Booker, mayor of Newark, New Jersey was making the rounds on the early morning news shows today. Cory's media interviews went well because of his preparation, focus, and energy. He spoke with passion which is a lesson for any good public speaker but he also demonstrated two principles of good media training. The two principles are honesty and bridging. First, he was straightforward in his answers. When the reporter asked him how could he "sell" the idea of a reduction in city services he responded that there was no good way to sell it. This is refreshing because it's the truth. He then bridged back to his message that it would take innovation, shrinking government, creating enterprise zones, etc. The reporter asked him at a later time how he could sell the reduction of services to his constituents. He again acknowledged that you can't sell it and brought back his solution of innovation.
A good reporter will ask a question three different times or in three different ways.
An effective public speaker who is media trained will give the same, consistent answer and not allow himself to go off message. Cory did this well.
To accomplish this, you must be well prepared and know your message points cold.
Effective media interviews require the confidence to stay on message and the agility to bridge from the reporter's question to your message point.
Help! I Have a Video Media Interview
A reader sent me an email today:
Dear Diane,
I will be representing SCORE on a small business management segment online later this week. I know the subject matter well. I just need your suggestions and tips as being interviewed on video is new territory for me.
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Video marketing is a powerful medium. When you're invited as an expert will you be ready? Here are some media training tips for when you present on video:
Look at the host who is interviewing you. If it’s a webcam feed, then look directly into the camera. With built in webcams, you may have to look up in order to be eye-to-eye with the viewers. That means you won’t see your notes on the screen too easily.
Begin with a hook to grab their attention-a statistic, a statement. Ex. "Host, Did you know that 80% of small businesses fail when using ecommerce?"
Build in a quick success. Ex." One client increased his online revenues when he learned to do this one thing…"
Speak in soundbites. This is critical. Write down 3-6 main messages. Each point should be one sentence, one thought. Say it crisply and then give an example. There’s no time for long storytelling in a media interview.
Video segments must move quickly.
Keep your language simple. Aim for 8th grade language. Avoid using too many technical terms. Use simple analogies. Ex. "Not having an ecommerce site is like not having a phone".
Talk from the audience view point. Don’t assume they know what you’re talking about. Provide value. What do they care about? Talk to those issues. Don’t be too detailed or they will tune out.
Be passionate. Video is an energy drain. That means you’ll seem more enthusiastic live than on the screen. So push your energy-especially in your vocal tone. Emphasize key words.
Be yourself. Sound like you’re having a conversation. Don’t talk at the audience; converse with them.
Don’t over gesticulate. Fast movements may not televise well.
Smile. You need to look friendly and inviting.
Imagine the audience. If you’re talking into a webcam you won’t be able to see reactions so get a picture in your mind of people responding to you.
Keep your head still. Your head should be straight on your neck with little or no tilting.
Sit or stand up straight. Slouching will send a negative message.
Know what is behind you as background. Are you in someone’s studio? Ask about the backdrop color. You don’t want to wear black if the background is black.
Check your appearance in a mirror right before the interview. Check for dandruff, a crooked tie, fly away hair, or shine. Use some dusting powder to avoid shine on the face or bald spots. Use hair spray and take it with you. Hair that stands up is distracting.
Don’t wear loud prints or large check patterns. They don’t televise well.
PAUSE between thoughts. This will eliminate /ums/ and allow time for the message to land.
End with food for thought or an action step. Ex. "Businesses are leaving money on the table when it comes to ecommerce. Go to www._________for a free assessment."
Remember it’s not about you-it’s about them (the audience).
Media training is no longer for authors and celebrities. Whether you're interviewing for a job, speaking as a guest expert online, or even sending a video email to your friends, all public speakers will eventually use the powerful medium of video presentations.
What's Your Speaker Business Model?
On Friday, November 19th, I was on a panel at the NYC National Speakers Association meeting. The panelists included, Don Gabor, Ann Fry, Diane DiResta, Audrey Smaltz, and Richard Marker. Bob Frare served as the emcee. Each presenter told their story and shared their business models to a packed room held at the NY Bar Association. Most speakers shared that they hadn't planned to be professional speakers but rather fell into it.
Here is an overview of the basic speaking business models:
1. Freelance subcontractor. This is where a speaker is hired to do an existing program designed by training companies or other speakers. The advantage is the training company does the marketing and the speaker is paid for delivery. My friend calls this "Show up and throw up." You don't need to be an expert but you must have excellent platform skills and a knowledge of the subject matter.
2. Corporate training model. The speaker delivers his/her own material developed for a particular audience. The advantage is the fees are higher and you own the account. You can also penetrate deeper into a company for more business. Companies continually need to train their workforce and will look for outside experts and consultants to improve performance.
3. Keynote or motivational speaker. This kind of speaker targets the association and corporate market and is generally speaking to large groups. They speak at a lot of conferences and conventions and must have an inspiring message and or a deep level of expertise. Keynote speakers command the highest fees but the downside is they are always looking for the next gig. A convention will not hire the same keynoter for two consecutive years. They often partner with speakers bureaus to book business . The life of a keynoter is to be a road warrior.
4. Product sales model or BOR (back- of- the- room sales). Presenters speak for the purpose of selling products. They either stage their own public seminars and events or speak at conferences. This also can be a lucrative model but the speaker must be able to create products that people want and most importantly, be able to sell from the platform. Selling products from the back -of- the -room is challenging and this model is recommended only for those who have excellent selling skills and can move a crowd to action. It requires getting in front of large groups, transporting products, and having a merchant account.
A subset of BOR is internet sales. Some speakers direct the audience to their websites and sell hard copies and digital products. Other speakers have morphed into primary internet businesses and deliver their message through teleclasses and webinars.
5. Enterprise model. This kind of speaker owns a bonafide business and manages employees. They may own a restaurant, a real estate company, a training company or other enterprise which they can sell. The bulk of their income is derived from the business and speaking is yet another but not the sole source of their income. This is often the most lucrative model because the speaker does not have to trade time for money. Employees or freelancers deliver the product or service. The speaker is positioned as an expert about the business or industry and may speak on business or motivational topics.
When choosing a business model, the main message from the panelists was play to your strengths.
The smartest speakers combine multiple streams of income.
Five Myths Marketers Believe About Presentations
Yesterday, I wrote a guest post on Randall Beard's blog. I've copied the article here for my readers.
Having coached a number of marketers on their presentations, it’s come to my attention that when delivering presentations even the most creative marketing professionals may be sabotaging their success. The reason many marketing ideas are rejected by management is not because of the quality of the idea. It’s more often because of the way the idea is presented.
Five Myths Marketers Believe About Presentations
Here are five presentation myths that marketers need to dispel:
1. It’s about the numbers. I’ve seen marketing clients who believe that if the numbers back up their idea, it will sell. Nothing could be further from the truth. Marketers fall in love with the numbers and make this the focal point of the presentation. Then they’re shocked when senior management isn’t excited about their new product launch.
Reality: It’s passion that sells. I had one client who was shot down after presenting a new product. The reason was not because it wasn’t a good product. It was because it wasn’t a compelling presentation. The feedback her manager gave me was that she presented the facts but there was no enthusiasm. Tell the story behind the numbers. Senior management needs to be sold in the same way the consumer needs to be sold.
Marketers, Take Note: Passion Sells
2. Defend your position. One client got into hot water because of a need to defend his idea. When you’re wedded to your way of thinking you can alienate your boss and your supporters.
Reality: Defending a position may actually backfire on you. Some marketers believe if it isn’t invented here, it doesn’t count. Being flexible and open to other ideas will up the ante on your presentation. Listening and questioning are the keys to success in selling your idea. If you don’t know the answer admit it and offer to get back to the questioner. “Fake it til you make it
Elevator Pitches Would Be Better if They Didn’t Make You Gag
Jeannette Paladino, author of the blog, Write Speak Sell, recently interviewed Business Coach for Introverts & Shy, Patricia Weber about elevator pitches. We're including her write-up as a guest blog post. Here's what she had to say:
Elevator pitches have gotten a bad rap because most aren’t very good. Pat Weber, Business Coach for Introverts and Shy, is a business colleague I met on LinkedIn. It turns out we both have strong opinions about what I prefer to call a brand statement — because it is supposed to communicate in about 30 seconds the “what’s in it for me?
Presenting At Trade Shows
Trade shows are presentations and exhibiting is serious business. I've seen exhibitors lose sales because they didn't know how to present themselves at the booth. Follow these simple tips to increase your traffic:
* Define your purpose. Why are you there? To conduct market research? To generate leads? To introduce a new product? Defining your purpose will give you a clear focus for the day.
* Project the right image. Are you upscale? Small but friendly? Specially priced? Once you agree on the company's image, define your behaviors and act accordingly.
* Set goals. Be specific. "To generate 25 new leads for hotel rooms by April 1st is measurable and specific. By setting a goal you'll be able to measure your success. * Organize the booth. Rid the booth of clutter. If you have a lot of handouts place them out of view away from the brochures. You can pull them out if needed. Don't drink coffee or eat snacks while you're in the booth; it creates an unprofessional look. Take a break and eat in the concession area. Don't read the newspaper during slow times. Remember all eyes are on you.
* Polish your presentation. Greet each person with a smile, a firm handshake, and direct eye contact. Nobody wants to buy from someone who's darting eyes are looking for the next lead. Be warm and enthusiastic. Take short notes when talking to a prospect. Don't chew gum, smoke, or chat with co-workers while you're in the booth. And never leave the booth unattended.
* Put your best foot forward. It's best to stand in front of the booth. That makes it easier to greet customers. Sitting will make you look too casual and not ready to do business.
* Promote the booth. Send invitations and advertise in advance of the event. Schedule appointments to meet with existing customers. Sponsor a fun event at your booth such as roulette or golf and watch the crowds gather.
* Don't give away the store. Instead of handing bags of premiums to everyone who walks by, ask for business cards. Keep gifts on the back table. When someone arrives, ask for a business card in exchange for a prize.
* Prepare an opening line. Know your audience. Don't waste time talking to non-buyers. "Are you a meeting planner?' "Do you purchase computers?" "Are you a purchasing agent?" If the answer is yes you can continue your presentation. Otherwise, politely send them on their way. Your goal is to present to qualified prospects.
* Listen, listen, listen. The number one reason for losing the sale is the salesperson didn't listen. Listen for needs and wants. Most trade show presenters are too busy talking. Listening will give you the competitive edge.