Your Presentation is in Your Head

My friend told me that when she was growing up she would pass a dilapidated house on the road. As they drove by she would envision a white picket fence among other embellishments. She saw the house refurbished in her mind. Her family would make fun of her. When they passed the next fixer upper on the road they'd say "What do you see now?" This was before the house improvement shows and even before Martha Stewart was on the scene. My friend could see a beautiful presentation when nobody else could.

When you give a presentation, do you see yourself as that dilapidated house or do you see the beautiful finished product? Do you see yourself with limitations or do you see yourself as you can be?

People fear public speaking because they have limited vision.

They see an image of themselves as ineffective and the audience as the adversary that keeps them stuck. It's time to change the picture! Public speaking is a skill anyone can learn. I've coached C-level executives and I've coached 7th graders to succeed. Not everybody is a visionary like my friend. But everybody can benefit from a champion. Whether it's a coach, a friend, a support group, an internal advocate, reach out and borrow someone's positive vision of you. The secret to a knockout presentation is the vision in your head!

To learn how to Speak Confidently and Effectively check out my LinkedIn learning course. It ranked on the Top 20 Most Popular courses for 2 years.

To learn techniques to overcome fear of speaking, read chapter 3 of Knockout Presentations.

To work with me contact DiResta Communications, Inc.

Is Public Speaking Like Eating Peas?

When I was a child, I didn’t like eating peas. I would sit at the dinner table and push them around on my plate. Then, I’d spear one pea with my fork and gulp it down like bitter medicine. My grandfather observing this avoidance ritual suggested I mix my peas in my mashed potatoes so I wouldn’t taste them. It worked! I started mixing peas and mashed potatoes at dinner. I still didn’t like peas but he made them more palatable.

And this is the case for many people. They avoid public speaking because they don’t like it. I would have been okay if I didn’t have peas in my diet. But for professionals and leaders, avoiding public speaking is career suicide. Consider the second year law student I coached who was going to drop out of law school because she was afraid of speaking in class. After coaching her she learned to mix the right mindset with the right skill set. Imagine if she had dropped out of law school because of public speaking fear.

Today she’s a lawyer and giving effective presentations. She found the right mix.

Consider the middle manager who avoided speaking at meetings. Her throat would tighten up causing her to clam up and not participate. The quickest way to become invisible in an organization is by not participating. The effect is not having a voice in meetings. The common perception is if you remain silent you don’t know anything. This can result in forfeiting promotions and being overlooked for high visibility projects or leadership opportunities.  I coached her to reduce vocal tension. She learned how to work her mind and her body so that the words wouldn’t stick in her throat.

Today, she has a new job at a higher level. And she’s speaking with ease.

An entrepreneur was successful in her business and enjoyed being a podcast host. She confided in me that she would love to speak on large stages but because of an auditory processing problem she couldn’t give speeches. She was not able to remember the sequence of ideas and words no matter how many times she practiced. She had so much to offer an audience but had given up on ever being on a big stage. This disability was her peas. She needed to find the mashed potatoes to overcome the limitation. I convinced her that she could speak on large stages. She could share her ideas. But the medium would be different.  Instead of delivering a speech which would stress her out and leave her searching for words, she could give a fireside chat. By putting two chairs on the stage, the interviewer could ask her questions allowing her to tell her story, share her wisdom, and inspire the audience. She was brilliant in conversation and on podcasts. A fireside chat would not require memorization and would showcase her brilliance.

She was excited to find the right mix that would allow her to reach more people and change more lives.

Today I like sweet peas. I’ve acquired a taste for them but it took time. For some people, public speaking is an acquired taste. As they gain confidence and mastery, they begin to enjoy giving presentations. For others, they may never like speaking. But by combining the right mental attitude and skill set they can certainly make it more palatable.

To learn how to Speak Confidently and Effectively check out my LinkedIn learning course. It ranked #5 on the Top 20 Most Popular courses.

To learn techniques to overcome fear of speaking, read chapter 3 of Knockout Presentations.

To work with me contact DiResta Communications, Inc.

The Missing Link in Presentations

Are you wondering why your audience isn’t excited? Or why they’re not sold on your ideas at meetings? Most presenters work hard to craft and deliver their sales presentations. So why don’t they get the results they desire?

They know the content backwards and forwards. They reveal what they think is great about their ideas or products. There’s no question they can’t answer. These presenters bring their A game with dynamic delivery. On the surface, it’s a good presentation. Yet, there’s no momentum. Too often public speakers think from their own point of view. 

These presenters forgot to connect the head and heart!

Consider these two acronyms. WIIFM and WSIC.

The first step is to answer the question, What’s In It For Me, meaning the audience. What’s important to them? It doesn’t matter if you have the most clever idea or the best product unless it meets their needs. And that’s where most presenters stop. The challenge is that you’re addressing needs but not tapping into why. WSIC means Why Should I Care? This is the dream or outcome of receiving those benefits. We’re talking about emotions. There is motion in the word emotion. The audience will take action when your message taps into their emotions.

It’s about connecting what they’ll gain with the impact of the benefits.

Benefit  (Head)                       Impact (Heart)

Save time                                More family events

Save money                           Buy the vacation property

Lose weight                            Look good and fit into your new clothes

Everybody wants to save time, money and be healthy. But their reasons may vary. Recall the last time you were excited about a purchase. Was your excitement about the product or how it made you feel? We’re more easily convinced by emotion than by logic but we need both.

A friend told a story about his trip to the car dealership. He was interested in a sports car. He loved the car but it came with a high price tag. The sales person told him to sit behind the wheel. He then said, “It makes you feel cool, doesn’t it?” My friend bought the car. He tapped into his emotions.

By translating what they’ll learn from you to why it’s important to them, you’ll connect the head and heart. And that is the missing link.

 Anybody can give a Knockout Presentation. Avoid these 6 mistakes and take your presentation from dull to dynamic!

My presentations, training , coaching and books are available virtually. It’s easy to find me to discuss your needs. Email diane@diresta.com. Subscribe to my youtube channel Or call: 917 803-8663

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Here Come Da Judge: Succeeding in Virtual Court

You many have your day in court but it’s probably not going to be at a courthouse near you.   There’s a greater likelihood that you’ll be in virtual court and that requires a new set of skills.  The Honorable Gustavo A. Gelpí & Honorable Julie Kunce Field delivered a presentation entitled Holding Virtual Court: A Conversation with Two Judges.

During the conversation they shared insights about holding court during a pandemic, the advantages and disadvantages of virtual court, their expectations, and recommendations.

In discussing some of the challenges, they revealed that people may not be tech savvy. In order to mitigate this issue they recommended that anyone appearing in court should request a practice session with a court officer prior to their hearing. Another challenge is controlling noise and conversation and for that reason, the judges mute everybody. Acknowledging the limitations of body language on a virtual platform, they requested that participants display a waist shot for the camera when in their courtrooms.. And speaking of cameras, the judges preferred Webex over Zoom for security reasons. In open court, where anybody can sit in, each person observing was expected to identify themselves.

Their advice to lawyers was that the skills that work in a physical courtroom don’t translate to the virtual world. The flamboyant lawyers who bang on the desk, and continually interrupt, don’t fare well in this environment. Legal presentations must adapt to the virtual environment. Although remote communication was thrust upon all of us, the judges reported that in many cases virtual court was successful. Saving time was touted as one of the biggest benefits of virtual court especially for a lawyer who would have to travel for a couple of hours to attend a 15 minute meeting. The situation where virtual court was not appropriate was where a jury was required. But in non-jury court hearings, an expert can be easily brought in from any geographic region, saving travel time and costs.

Both judges predicted the future will be hybrid court for it’s convenience. Major trials will be held in person, but in other situations the virtual platform will be beneficial in settling legal cases.

Virtual court is not just for lawyers and judges. You never know when you’ll need to appear to challenge a summons or handle a landlord tenant dispute. The virtual world is not going away. Master virtual presentation skills and you’ll have a better chance of winning your case. To learn how to be a knockout virtual presenter, visit www.diresta.com

My presentations, training and coaching are available virtually. It’s easy to find me to discuss your needs. Email diane@diresta.com. DM me at twitter @speakingpro. Or call: 917 803-8663

What Hillary Clinton Can Teach Us About Using Your Voice

There’s been talk about Hillary Clinton’s coughing and whether she’s damaging her voice. It made me think of how speakers unknowingly abuse their voices. Often public speakers yell in order to project. Yelling is not only irritating to listen to, but will cause eventual hoarseness. It causes strain on the vocal folds. Presenters should request a microphone, project from the diaphragm, and not from the neck muscles. And incessant coughing can also cause damage. Coughing causes the vocal folds to forcefully slam together.

One of the bigger problems for professional and public speakers is laryngopharyngeal reflux, an inflammation near the back part of the larynx due to acid rising to that point. Thirty-five million people in the United States have acid reflux.

“This inflammatory condition causes the vocal folds to function less efficiently leading to vocal fatigue and poor projection,” states Dr. Thomas Murry, clinical director, professor of speech pathology in otolaryngology at the Voice and Swallowing Center of Columbia Presbyterian Medical Center, Columbia University. Reflux is most common among speakers because so many speakers are on the go, stressed and may have poor diets. Being aware of the symptoms of reflux can help speakers take preventative steps to take care of the problem.

The big five symptoms are:

• Vocal fatigue
• Lack of projection
• Hoarseness as the day wears on
• Throat clearing
• Increased phlegm in the throat

Preserving the Voice

To preserve the voice, don’t constantly clear your throat or talk over noise.  Instead, Murry recommends the silent cough technique.

The silent cough technique is a way to clear the throat without violently banging the vocal folds together. The silent cough is done by breathing in air and blowing the air out fast through your throat and mouth without making a sound. Immediately after the silent cough, you should tuck your chin down toward your chest and make a strong swallow. The silent cough often clears mucous that clings to the vocal folds or near them. The silent cough is an important element of vocal hygiene and helps to prevent unnecessary trauma to the vocal folds. It is especially important to use the silent cough after surgery to the vocal folds.

If the symptoms of reflux continue, go to the doctor before the problem becomes severe.

Another common physical voice problem is vocal paresis, a weakness in one or both vocal muscles manifesting in breathiness or fatigue. Both folds must come together symmetrically to produce a clear, resonant voice. Vocal paresis can be caused by a flu or viral infection. When the nerve is inflamed, the condition can last for six months to a year, causing the speaker to change habits to adjust to the inflammation. A monotone may be an indicator of a minor defect or partial paralysis. Also, public speakers who have difficulty projecting could have some vocal fold asymmetry. Tape yourself and listen to how you sound. Also, be aware if you find people asking you to talk louder. This may be an indication that you are suffering from vocal paresis.

Breathiness and Hoarseness

Women are more inclined to get polyps or nodules, which are growths that prevent complete closure of the vocal folds and create breathiness. “In females, the back part of the vocal folds never completely closes due to the way they are formed. So the female voice is always going to be a little bit more breathy than the male’s because of anatomy,” states Murry.

If you are suffering from breathiness, take action and get checked out. It is always better to be safe than sorry. The definition of the term “frustrated and feeling sorry for yourself" is to wake up to find that you’re hoarse when you have a big speaking engagement.

When hoarseness is the problem, first determine that there is no hemorrhage. Then start a process of hydration and steam. Public speakers should travel with a facial steamer. When staying in a dry hotel room, opera singers use them every hour for five minutes. Alternatively, you can make boiling water in your coffee pot, pour it into the ice bucket, and throw a towel over your head to reap the benefits of steam.

To avoid becoming hoarse, avoid alcohol, chocolate and caffeine before a speech. They will dehydrate the mucous membranes, causing hoarseness. Finally, after an all-day motivational program, get plenty of rest and drink lots of water. Before you climb into bed, toss out those mint chocolates on your pillow; they are a double whammy because the mint relaxes the lower esophagus and allows acid to come up.

Making a difference in the lives of your audience is done with your instrument—your voice. With proper breathing, voice training and vocal hygiene, your voice will be strong, healthy and you’ll master true vocal power.

What a Cashier Taught Me about Presentations

I went to the supermarket to pick up a few items. Not wanting to wait in line, I found a cashier who was without customers. She had her back turned as she was shuffling a deck of coupons. I approached her and stood there expecting her to stop what she was doing to serve me. She did not. She continued to organize the coupons and never said a word to me or attempted to make eye contact. She placed a rubber band around the coupons, put them in the drawer and without saying a word, started to ring up the two items.

It was like I wasn't there.

Viewing this as an experiment in communication, I said nothing. Neither did she. After ringing up the groceries she spoke for the first time. "$6.07, " she said. As I was digging for change she turned and talked to the other cashiers. I paid the bill and left. Talk about feeling invisible.

Yes, she was a young person being paid minimum wage but that's not an excuse for being rude. (Although I doubt that was her perception). I've had friendlier and more helpful service from others in her position. It made me think about what was being communicated by this cashier. By not acknowledging that I was standing in front of her I felt ignored and not valued as a customer. She had no idea of the impact of her silence and lack of friendliness. By not greeting a customer and avoiding eye contact, she tarnished the brand of the store. There was little difference between doing business with her and scanning my own groceries in the self service line. I left with a negative feeling about the supermarket although I've shopped there many times.

My husband reminded me that he doesn't like going to our local Thai restaurant even though the food is good and inexpensive. He dislikes the waitress who doesn't smile and looks annoyed all the time. He calls her "a pill". Think about it. He doesn't want to eat where the food is good because he doesn't like her attitude. She non-verbally communicates that the customers are an annoyance to her. She's creating a negative feeling.

How often do we minimize soft skills in the business world? Something as seemingly basic as greeting a person or making eye contact can have a big impact. It's part of your presentation. In graduate school, I waited tables at a  New York City fast food restaurant in the middle of Times Square. (That's another story). I quickly learned the ROI of interpersonal skills. A greeting, friendly tone, and a smile could yield a better tip.

There's a barista at my local Starbucks named Gus. He remembers everyone's name. When I walk in the store, he starts making my green tea because he knows my order. Gus makes customers feel special and I always ask for him.

So the point is this. We are always presenting ourselves and the organization we represent. McDonald's understands this. Every entry level worker greets each customer by looking at them and saying "Welcome to McDonalds". They are well trained because the company recognizes that communication impacts their brand. It's the intangibles that drive the tangible. The next time you have a meeting or presentation, be fully present, acknowledge the other person and whatever your topic, serve it up with a smile.

Speaking Lessons from Shark Tank

Last month I had the good fortune to hear Kevin O’Leary of Shark Tank speak at a networking event. Unlike typical celebrity events, this venue was intimate, allowing contact with Mr O’Leary and even a photo opp. After drinks and hors d’oeuvres, we gathered into a small theater-like room to hear him speak. His speaking approach surprised me and I found it refreshing. Instead of the usual PowerPoint, or main stage podium presentation, Mr O’Leary entered the room in an unassuming manner yet strongly communicated executive presence. After being introduced, he stood next to a leather chair, his only prop a wine glass in hand as he told his story.

He began by telling us about his mother’s influence on how he thinks about his investments today and took us on a journey from his early, hungry years, the “tough love” lessons from his mother, and how he is raising his children based on his own upbringing. He discussed the issue of how to stay grounded after acquiring riches, his decisions and relationships on Shark Tank, his current enterprises, and advice for today’s entrepreneurs. His decisions to do business with partners isn’t contingent on liking them and he was clear about separating personal feelings from business.

Politics was not part of the presentation until the last questioner asked for his opinion on the Presidential election which he answered directly. Ever the salesman, he ended with a call to action. He let the audience know that he owned a vineyard and we could buy his $60 red wine for $10 on QVC.

Mr. O’Leary didn’t miss a beat. He spoke fluently, conversationally, and matter-of-factly, as he wove sage advice through his stories. This was not a speech but a conversation. And the audience loved it!  It was interesting how much of the presentation I retained because he made the message memorable.

What I learned was this: The best public speakers stay true to themselves. Kevin O’Leary has a quiet style but was no less captivating than a Tony Robbins. He told his personal story and made a connection with the audience. By sharing business successes and an inside view of SharkTank, he provided real value to an audience of entrepreneurs. He didn’t waffle when asked a political question. He put a stake in the ground. And of course, he told us how to get a discount on his wine. The audience was captivated. And that’s why he’s called Mr.Wonderful.